Sex and money are two of the biggest reasons why marriages end in divorce. They are considered taboo subjects that are usually avoided prior to marriage.

One thing that can kill a marriage is arguments about money. When couples have debt or argue about how much or on what money is spent or saved you can have major problems. Many couples fight about money rather than address deeper problems that may lie underneath. It's always what the money represents: dependency, control, freedom, security, pleasure, self-worth, that the couple is actually struggling with. Most couples come to relationships with different attitudes about money, and even people with similar views will polarize each other over time: Two spenders will change, so that one becomes more conservative with money while the other becomes more reckless and extravagant.

Two most common finance personalities are savers and spenders:

Saver: It is easy for savers to build a large savings account on a modest salary. Savers are well-organized, not impulsive, and avoid risk. For these folks, a savings account represents security. The downside: Savers often see saving as an end in itself and fail to use their money wisely. They can be too conservative and avoid investments that would make their money grow faster and free them to follow their muse.

Spender: Spenders see money as a means to create fun and status with the latest gizmo, a flashy car, or stylish clothes. Spenders can be overly generous, impulsive, and carefree. They are not however synonymous with compulsive shoppers. The downside: Spenders often clueless when it comes time to save for life changing events such as starting a family, college, retirement.

For saver and spender to live harmoniously they need to understand what money represents to one another. Just like other needs, they should try to fulfill each other’s needs by figuring out how important, for example, a purchase is as compared to saving for a joint goal.

Money issues can kill sex drive and sex has always been one of the top reasons for marriage failure. It’s either no sex, too little sex, too much sex, lack of knowledge concerning sex, sex used as a weapon/reward, or infidelity. Couples are apprehensive to discuss their ideas and desires about sex. It is commonly and rightfully believed that men have a higher sex drive.  Testosterone, one of the hormones responsible for sex drive, is 20-40% higher in men than women. This gender difference often creates problems in marriages.  Men think their wives are withholding sex and women think their husbands are only interested in sex.

This polarity does not need to exist. One way to meet each other is by visualizing what it would be like to live in each other’s shoes for a while. The husband probably walks around feeling that if his wife loved him more, she would be more sensitive to his needs. He undoubtedly feels hurt and rejected and might even question his sex appeal.

The wife probably feels that if he loved her more, he would be more understanding and respectful of her desire to cuddle and communicate more often. The wife also sometimes walks around feeling bad that her husband never seems satisfied, that no matter what she does, he's always unhappy. This isn't a pleasant feeling when you love your partner.

There are lots of ways to accomplish a satisfying sex life.

1. Flirt with each other.

Remember how you acted towards each other in the very beginning. Did you compliment each other, did you put your hand on the other’s knee, or make seductive eye contact.

2. Put other things aside and make time.

Set up date night. The conversation should steer clear of children, finance, health. But rather on fun topics such as movies, friends, etc.  Your marriage can be better than ever if you set time aside to work on it.

3. Discover new ways to rev up your sex life

Cast your inhibitions to the wind and experiment with anything that might intrigue you both. Women try the new poleates classes; men try to seduce your wife via txt, email, and notes throughout the day.

Sex and money are hot topics and can both be seen are punishment and reward. Communicate with your partner about their needs and goals, with a respectful slant and the chances are you will find more similarities then differences.