“Someone else’s opinion of you is none of your business.” – Rachel Hollis.
Perspective is an interesting concept – it is a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view. Everyone’s perspective is different. Everyone has shaped their own view of reality, and they perceive the ways that people treat them as good or bad. Even if the intention of the other person is not always to be good or bad. What if we suddenly changed our perspective of the way people treated us and just assumed that we were universally liked by everyone we meet? What would this do to our confidence, self-esteem, and general outlook on life? Would this perspective make us more social, more brave? More likely to do things that we normally wouldn’t? Would we be more willing to participate in more social occasions, therefore bringing more joy to our lives?
Confidence can do wonders for you! To build confidence, you need to change….your PERSPECTIVE. You need to assume that if someone is grumpy, or giving an attitude, that it has NOTHING to do with you and everything to do with their own situation. The saying “Assume they like you, and they will” is true! If you go in to a group setting, with an air of confidence, and the attitude that you are well-liked, then you will be!
Being afraid of rejection before being rejected is like poison to your confidence and slowly kills your chances of showing your true self. How can you show your wonderful personality through all that unwanted anxiety? How will people see how tremendous you are through all that fear? When you appear sheepish, scared, and afraid, you also start to obsess over what you say, and how you say it. This is not at all fun for you or for the group of friends you are trying to have a good time with.
Humans in nature are social creatures, and we have a need to belong somewhere. We need friends, loved ones, and people that are important to us, who we are also important to. There is an ongoing confusion between people needing to belong, and the NEED to belong consuming you. Sure, don’t obsess over people liking you. But know that you do need people in your life that are important to you. It doesn’t have to be a large group of people, but the value of people is great in your life.
If you come across as fearful of people rejecting you, then you are kind of coming across as fearful of people, in general. Remember that you are liked – from the very first meeting! Remember that your first impression will be enough, your first impression is luminous, your first impression is sensational!
If you feel you need help with your first impressions – here are five tips to making a good first impression. Just to boost that confidence level.
- Assume they already like you and they probably will.
- Treat them! Meet over food or coffee, if possible.
- Always shake their hand. Firm grip!
- Be Positive About Yourself!
- Show interest and ask questions about them.